my mom is really hilarious. not like she thinks she's a comedian or tries hard to be funny, she just says some strange things and, largely, i think her special funnyness goes unacknowledged.

in the past few days, she has said some things that are especially good, such as...

my grandma had these photos of floor tiles from my uncle's house because she wanted to trace the things she saw in them, you know, like faces and mystical things. she kept trying to get my mom to say what she saw and my mom said she didn't see anything. finally, she gave in and said the only thing she saw was "a frankenstein smoking a joint."

we always get way too freaked out when we see roaches in the house. the other night she caught one and flushed it down the toilet. i said "you flushed it down the toilet?" kind of surprised she didn't just throw it outside. she said she had done this because she doesn't like to kill them and she likes to think that when they get flushed, the poison (roach spray they are infected with) gets washed off of them and when they get down to the sewer, they can crawl out and have a happy life.

she told me that she made up something called "bride panties" when she was talking to a friend at work. she tricked him into believing that bride panties are like diapers that brides wear when they have on their big poofy wedding dress so in case they have to go, they don't have to take off the dress. and he believed her! she never told him she was making it up. hee hee.

oh mom.